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New 18 min

Episode 60: Should She Stay With Her Friends or Move Down to Play More?

https://heysammi.com/ The age group changes just opened a door. Your daughter can play up and stay with all her friends, or move down where she will probably touch the ball more and build some confidence. Everybody has an opinion. Nobody has a clear answer. This week Coach Bill, a 17 year veteran coach, and Stormie Brooks, a youth sports mom, take on a question from Lauren in Providence, Rhode Island. In this episode: Stormie starts with something parents mix up all the time. Being comfortable around your friends and being confident in your sport are two different things. If it really comes down to friends or more touches, Stormie picks the touches. New teammates and new coaches are a smaller price than a season of heartbreak at the end of the bench. Bill gives the coach side. A group that already plays well together is worth keeping when a program is trying to win, and knowing each other on the court matters more than being friends off it. They talk about why you can't hand a kid playing time, and why parents should bring solutions instead of only reacting when their kid is upset. And they flip it around. Staying at her own age level can be a chance for her to lead and mentor younger players, and that confidence sticks. This week's takeaway: know what your kid actually wants out of the season, then pick the spot where she gets to be seen. Got a tough question that might stump Coach Bill and Stormie? Email it to hey@heysammi.com. If yours gets picked, they'll answer it on the show from both the coach side and the parent side. Hey Sammi is the AI team parent for youth sports families. She reads your team calendars and texts you what you need, when you need it. No app required. https://heysammi.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

New 11 min

Episode 59 When the Team Leaves Your Kid Behind

https://heysammi.com/ You find out most of your daughter’s team has been quietly planning a new team for next season. Everyone knew. She didn’t get the invite. Now you have to decide whether to tell her what really happened. This week Coach Bill, a 17 year veteran coach, and Stormie Brooks, a youth sports mom of seven years, take on a question from Heather in Cleveland, Ohio. In this episode: Stormie doesn’t think this one is close. She’d tell her daughter, and tell her why it’s okay. Kids who leave a teammate out without a word aren’t the people she wants her kid around anyway, and learning that early is a lesson that reaches way past sports. Bill connects it to the bigger picture. Not getting picked happens in life too. The job, the promotion. It stings, and then you get over it. They talk about the tunnel vision kids get with their team and their friends, and how a moment like this can open doors your kid never would have looked for. Stormie breaks it into two parts. Part one is telling your kid this could open up new opportunities. Part two is the one parents skip: saying “let’s go look” and actually doing it together. For that stretch, you become their team. Then Bill raises a twist. What if it was the coach who formed the new team and hand picked who came along? Stormie’s answer gets even simpler, and both agree on whether it’s worth approaching that coach to ask why. This week’s takeaway: don’t just tell your kid a door opened. Go walk through the search with them. Got a tough question that might stump Coach Bill and Stormie? Email it to hey@heysammi.com. If yours gets picked, they’ll answer it on the show from both the coach side and the parent side. Hey Sammi is the AI team parent for youth sports families. She reads your team calendars and texts you what you need, when you need it. No app required. https://heysammi.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

New 7 min

Episode 58: What Do I Do When My Daughter Says Everything Is About Her Brother?

https://heysammi.com What do you do when your other kid says everything is always about her brother's sports? A dad in Lexington wrote to me after his daughter said exactly that, calmly, and he couldn't argue, because the fridge calendar agrees with her. In this episode I mark what actually happened: a kid handed her family the bill while it's still small, instead of keeping silent score for ten years and cashing it out as distance in her twenties. The first move is confirmation, not correction: you're right, it has been all about his baseball, and it's changing. Then the four-piece rebalance. Her thing gets real infrastructure, calendar space, attendance, money spent without sighing, because kids measure importance in logistics, not speeches. Standing one-on-one time that travel baseball is not allowed to eat, and once in a while she watches baseball visibly lose. Divide-and-conquer weekends instead of whole-family tournament attendance. And the dinner table audit, because the resentment usually isn't about minivan hours, it's about airtime. Plus the conversation with the athlete himself, who probably knows the count too and might be relieved: siblings mostly want a family where nobody's the sun. Got a question for the show? Email me at hey@heysammi.com. https://heysammi.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

New 10 min

Episode 57 Does Paying for Lessons Buy Playing Time?

https://heysammi.com/ Your coach offers paid private lessons. The kids who take them seem to get the best spots. Maybe it’s a coincidence. It doesn’t feel like one. This week Coach Bill and Stormie Brooks, the youth sports mom, take on a question from Jason in Arizona. His kid isn’t doing the coach’s private lessons, and he’s watching the players who do get more chances. Is it favoritism, pay to play, or just extra reps paying off? In this episode: Bill explains how a coach can favor lesson kids without ever meaning to. After hours of one on one work, a coach wants to see the payoff, and that time together can quietly shape who gets on the floor. He hopes it’s never “you pay, you play,” but he’s honest that the subconscious pull is real. Stormie shares what she’d actually do in Jason’s shoes: ask the coach directly. Then she adds the hard caveat. Some programs punish kids when parents ask questions, and she lived it with her son, who begged her not to say anything because he was afraid it would get worse. The two dig into the difference between “the coach hates my kid” and “the coach doesn’t see my kid,” and why that second one is usually closer to the truth. Stormie offers a simple fix: tell the coach about the work your kid puts in away from practice. Her daughter didn’t like privates but hit the gym every day she didn’t have practice. A coach can’t reward effort they never see. And they talk about the part parents control. You can feel offended, but how you react will either help your kid or hurt them. This week’s takeaway: before you assume favoritism, make sure the coach knows what your kid is doing when nobody’s watching. Got a question for Coach Bill and Stormie? Send it in. They read every one and answer from both sides of the bleachers. Send it to hey@heysammi.com or visit heysammi.com Hey Sammi is the AI team parent for youth sports families. She reads your team calendars and texts you what you need, when you need it. No app required. https://heysammi.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

New 7 min

Episode 56: My 7 Year Old Has to Try Out. Am I Crazy or Are They?

https://heysammi.com Are tryouts for 7 year olds ridiculous? A mom in Des Moines wrote to me because her son has to try out to keep playing with basically the same kids he already plays with, and she wants to know if she's the crazy one. In this episode I give her the record on the record: no. Evaluating seven year olds is astrology with cones. The kid who dominates Saturday might just be the one who ate breakfast, and everything credible about development says you can't sort seven year olds meaningfully, and don't need to. So why does the tryout exist? It's for the org: selective feels premium, premium justifies fees, and the sorting-has-begun seed gets planted in parents early. Then the practical plan: manage the transmission so your kid experiences a fun scrimmage with extra adults, no pep talks, stakes kept in your head, same pizza either way, because teams at this age are arrangements, not verdicts. I also cover the polite question that makes the club explain itself in full sentences, the difference between balancing rosters and calling it a tryout, and the bigger picture: the sorting machine runs all the way up, but your house decides how much power it gets. A kid who reaches ten still thinking sports are about playing got away with something wonderful. Got a question for the show? Email me at hey@heysammi.com. https://heysammi.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

21 min

Episode 55 Are We on the Wrong Team?

https://heysammi.com/ Got a question for Sammi? Send it to hey@heysammi.com or visit heysammi.com Everybody in the bleachers has a stat app open. Somebody’s dad is filming every possession. And you showed up with a folding chair and a granola bar. This week Sammi answers a letter from Priya in Austin. The other parents on her team are way more intense than her family, and she’s starting to wonder if they’re on the wrong team altogether. In this episode: How to tell the difference between feeling out of place and actually being in the wrong place. Why the parents aren’t the team, and the three questions about your kid that matter more than how you feel on the sideline. Why the calm parent might be the most important adult your kid sees all weekend. The warning signs that intensity is leaking onto the field, from kids playing tight to a schedule your family never agreed to. What to do if you stay, and why you don’t have to match anybody. This week’s takeaway: on the ride home, ask your kid one question. What was the best part of today? Then listen for whether the answer has anything to do with the grown ups. If you’re the laid back family on an intense team, this one’s for you. Hey Sammi is the AI team parent for youth sports families. She reads your team calendars and texts you what you need, when you need it. No app required. Learn more and send your own question at heysammi.com Quick upload reminder for Megaphone: set the rating to Clean, fill the subtitle field, make both heysammi.com links clickable, and save as a draft. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

7 min

Episode 54: All the Good Players Left Rec for Travel. Now What?

https://heysammi.com What do you do when travel teams hollow out your rec league? A dad in Buffalo wrote to me because the strong players left, his son is frustrated that practices aren't competitive, and his family doesn't want the travel lifestyle. In this episode I name the structure: travel skims the top layer year after year, rec thins, more kids leave, and it's a doom loop no single family caused. Then the part the industry doesn't advertise: the gap between rec and travel isn't a canyon, it's a menu. Skills clinics and academies with no travel, school-adjacent teams, town select layers, the stronger league one town over, summer camps, and organized weekend pickup, the forgotten gem that somebody's group text has to start. The pattern is a la carte: travel sells competition bundled with hotels and your entire autumn, and you're allowed to buy the competition and skip the bundle. I also cover pushing the rec league itself toward skill-grouped or competitive tiers, because boards move when parents speak up, and the conversation with your kid: a no attached to a plan lands beautifully. It's the no attached to nothing that wears kids down. Got a question for the show? Email me at hey@heysammi.com. https://heysammi.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

7 min

Episode 53: Why Does She Beg to Sign Up, Then Fight Me About Every Practice?

https://heysammi.com What do you do when your kid loves games but fights going to practice? A mom in Grand Rapids wrote to me about her 8 year old: begs to sign up, beams on game day, and turns the front hallway into a hostage negotiation on practice nights. In this episode I start with the reassurance: both kids are real. Games are dessert, practice is dinner, and negotiating against dinner is just being eight. Then the detective work, because the fight has information in it. Is it a launch problem, fighting the leaving, not the practice, fine four minutes after arrival? Those have boring fixes: car snacks, packed bags, warning rituals, small choices. Or is it something inside the practice, a dreaded drill, a mean kid, a too-loud coach? Her shoulders in the first five minutes will tell you which letter you're in. And the straight answer on pushing: push on logistics, we signed up so we go, calm and boring like brushing teeth. Never push on love, no wasted-money lectures, no wanting-it-more speeches, because that's what actually kills sports for kids. Grumbling is not quitting. Plus the boundary: dread, tears, and stomachaches are a different language, and they get listened to, not pushed through. Got a question for the show? Email me at hey@heysammi.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

About Hey Sammi : Sports Parent Confessions

Got a youth sports question you can't ask in the group chat? Text me. I'll answer it on the show. Playing time, quitting mid-season, that one coach, the parent on the sideline who won't stop — every week I answer the real questions sports families are actually dealing with. Ten minutes. Every week. No judgment. I'm Sammi. Ask me anything.

Show details

Creator
Sammi
Hosted by
Bill Flitter, Steve Collins
Years active
2026 - 2025
Episodes
58
Copyright
Hey Sammi LLC

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